Day 151: Everyone has a favorite dinosaur.

“Go to your local natural history museum and make sure yours is properly displayed.”

This one prompted an existential crisis: do I actually have a favorite dinosaur?

After Jurassic Park, the raptor is everyone’s — and by everyone, I mean males in the early-20s to late-30s demographic — favorite, and so, as much as I like them, I have to pick a different favorite dinosaur. Raptors are too mainstream.

What about T-Rex? T-Rex is pretty awesome, especially this T-Rex. Also, I have a stuffed green T-Rex — “green” is probably redundant, because it seems like all T-Rexes (which is an incorrect pluralization, I know) are green — anyway, I have a stuffed T-Rex from my infancy that is still around, on loan to Jack. T-Rex is a cool dinosaur, but even more mainstream than raptors, really. Maybe they’re so mainstream they’re underground again? Not the ones that have been excavated, obviously, but the ones that haven’t been found yet.

Apatosaurus is pretty damn big, which is cool, but I’m not sure how I feel about having an herbivore as a favorite dinosaur. Vegetarians are cool and all, but not violent enough. Triceratops is a much more bad-ass herbivore, and I wouldn’t say this to a Triceratops’s face, but an herbivore is an herbivore, and anything that doesn’t eat animals is not quite good enough.

I’m hanging out with Lorna and my brother and his wife, drinking Pimm’s cups, and I asked the room at large whether people had favorite dinosaurs. Lorna said no, but Celia’s favorite is the Triceratops — also Brontosaurus (Apatosaurus) and Stegosaurus — and Jeff’s is raptors in general. Jeff also told me, in the blunt manner that a younger brother ought, that I was a dirty fucking hipster for not just embracing my liking of raptors. He’s right, really: they’re awesome, and T-Rex are awesome, and if I didn’t have a perverse need to not like things that everyone else likes, I’d have no problems. The whole point of this blog, though, is that I have problems. Stupid problems, and strong opinions about ridiculous things like water and peeling potatoes — I admit it, I’m well aware of it, but that’s how it is.

I’m not going to get any sleep tonight. Existential crisis not resolved. Life is terrible.

Damned dinosaurs.


3 Comments on “Day 151: Everyone has a favorite dinosaur.”

  1. Jeff says:

    you are a dirty fucking hipster

  2. Steve Goldsmith says:

    I think I understand the existential crisis Chris is facing, but I don’t get the DFH reference – too old for that. He may have problems and strong opinions, but those get exaggerated on the internet. I hope the kids are having fun together.

    I do not have an existential crisis picking my favorite dinosaur, and it is a bad-ass raptor, the one that should have been the star of Jurassic Park – Allosaurus (discovered by Othniel Charles Marsh in 1877) – which existed during the Jurassic period – they should have called the movie Cretaceous Park if they were going to use Tyrannosaurus. Allosaurus was about 30 feet long and weighed 5000 pounds, and routinely ate both large and small herbivorous dinosaurs, and smaller carnivores. Allosaurus may be obscure today, but it was a common and important part of its ecological community – we should all be glad that its community existed 150 million years ago. Especially because recent evidence suggests that it was a pack hunter with complex cooperative behavior. 30 foot long, 5000 pound pack hunters with complex cooperative behavior – scary. I am going to sleep well tonight knowing there are no 30 foot, 5000 pound pack hunters outside my house.

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