Day 26: Today choose what you’d prefer to be reincarnated as.Posted: January 26, 2011
This is easy, right? A house-cat. People feed you, give you a warm place to live, know not to expect much loyalty or affection, and let you come and go as you please. And you get to nap all day, and catch and eat birds and rodents.
I think I’d get bored.
I’m not sure what it says about me, but the things that come to mind first – even though none of them are quite right – are all mammals and predators: lion, grizzly bear, wolf, felis domesticus. If I was going to have to be an herbivore, I’d want to be one of the ones that predators think twice about fucking with: elephant, rhinoceros, hippopotamus. Maybe some sort of primate? Gorillas are also on the don’t-fuck-with-us list, and bonobos have lots of sex.
The problem is that most of the really cool animals are also endangered, and most are actively hunted by humans – which doesn’t exactly sound fun. A possible solution might be to come back as something relatively ubiquitous: a ferret, a weasel, a coyote. Those aren’t exactly glamourous, though, and if glamour isn’t the point of reincarnation, I don’t know what is.
I think, though, that what I’d most like to be reincarnated as is a Balaenoptera musculus – a blue whale. Aside from being bigger than anything else alive, blue whales have most of the ocean as a habitat, which would be awesome. As a human, I have a
fear of healthy respect for oceans; not only are they vast, but there’s a three-dimensionality to their vastness that flightless terrestrial mammals don’t really experience – what is below you stretches farther, much farther, than you can see, and anything could be down there. But if you’re 33 meters long and weigh 180+ tons, nothing that’s down there is that scary.